Shattering Halos Read online

  “Okay, I’m ready. Let’s do this thing,” I breathed.

  Cassiel laughed and leaned in to give my throat a playful bite. He followed me out on the balcony as I meandered into the star-studded night.

  He jumped the railing first. It made me giggle how fabulous he looked out there on the ledge, leaning back on his elbows, clad in sexy, black briefs.

  Oh, the things you mulled over when you were about to die. Like angels’ apparent inclination toward Armani underwear, and—because it made sense to you—how female angels should swear by Victoria’s Secret.

  He had to get up to help me over the banister. Once I was out there, I tripped a little, almost falling off the ledge. I laughed when Cassiel, smiling like we were playing a harmless game, steadied me with a firm grip around a thigh.

  Cassiel handed me his glass for a final sip after I’d stepped out to him. With a suggestive smirk, he studied how I sucked up and swallowed the strawberry. My last meal, a pulpy mass of a heart.

  “Are you going to follow me upstairs?” My voice aimed at his ear in a low slur.

  His scarcely audible reply came back. “No, I’m a Fallen, remember? Michael will bring you to the First Gate where Habbiel takes over. He rules the first Heaven. You’ll be fine.”

  There was no trace of deceit in his expression, but then again who knew?

  “Tell Gabriel I love him.”

  I crouched down on the ledge. With a hand on his knee, I leaned forward and took another peek. I could still turn around.

  What was the best way to jump? Should I roll off the edge? Was it better to stand? My body finally understood what I was doing. Slowly, it began to tremble, and I had to make up my mind fast.

  I rose to my feet and stood as tall as I could. In the freezing night air, my arms stretched out to my sides. My body shook with the adrenaline rush that broke through the alcohol. Yes, I was sure now.

  When I jumped, I dove like a skydiver, the negligee dancing fiercely around me. Once I left the ledge, I never considered landing.

  Before my lids closed, I saw Cassiel wave after me, glass still in hand, from his perch at the edge. Strange, but not more surreal than the last couple of years leading up to this moment. I was flying, the breeze my only companion.

  Then I felt it. The thrill of finally fixing something I had broken.

  The swooping sound of great wings enveloped me on all sides. Arms came around and cradled me. I fought to open my eyes against the powerful currents. I wanted to see Michael’s magnificence, but the wind was too strong.

  Protected by his embrace, I relaxed. We soared through the frigid night while something akin to goose bumps rose on my arms and legs.

  Despite the cold from the stratosphere, I let the bliss inundate me.

  Yes, I saved Gabriel! I’ve freaking done it!

  I was jubilant. Still drunk, strangely, but jubilant.

  ****

  This dream. The flutter of feather-light kisses all over my face, the warmth of a lap. Strong arms held me and didn’t let go. Amid the kisses, the same strangled words repeated over and over again.

  “You’re so stupid. You’re so stupid. You’re so stupid.”

  I didn’t mind being stupid when the words sounded like music and the kisses never ceased. At last, my eyes opened to meet the most cherished sky blue ones.

  Love and despair flooded that gaze, and I wondered about being here, in these arms. God, the way his jaw quivered as he choked out, “What were you thinking?”

  Chapter 17 — “Baby”

  Cassiel

  She was all right for an Earthling, I guess. More selfless than I’d expected. I’d spent all morning prepping her but hadn’t been sure until she “called upon me” in the woods. That’s when I knew she’d swallowed hook, line, and sinker.

  It could’ve been perfect. If only he hadn’t materialized, all light and freaking love, as she flung herself off the roof. Just like that, the idiot cremated my plan in one efficient poof.

  Oh well, it’d been worth a try. Everyone knew that white angels made terrible friends. You couldn’t even save them from themselves.

  At least, he didn’t spend time on revenge. Dude could have messed. Me. Up. His only concern was to snatch her and take flight before she splattered that pretty body all over the asphalt.

  How did he see through it, you say? Her measly show of wanting me must not have convinced him. I sure as hellfire meant business.

  ****

  Gaia

  I must have been out for a while. Amber and verbena…the aroma played in my nostrils, jogging my memory. I smiled, remembering my accomplishment. Gabriel was a Celestial; of course Heaven smelled like him!

  The heat of the sun unfolded against my back, and a new serenity spread through me. Finally, everything was going to be okay.

  My existence in this place could wait another minute. No need to tackle the ins and outs yet even if I did wonder how I’d fare up here. A brief flutter of butterflies rose inside. Would I fit in?

  My Gabriel.

  Safe.

  What was he doing now? Had they assigned him a little baby? A swell of longing for him surged, but it jumbled with nausea and an insistent throbbing in my head.

  I admired the tolerance of the presence I sensed nearby, the way it let me nurse a hangover from my last day on Earth.

  Splayed on my stomach, my muscles creaked when I shifted from a position I must have been in for hours. My left side slanted up from smooth sheets and rested on something warm.

  Oh. No.

  I held my breath, noticing how my left arm stretched bare across someone else’s skin. My fingertips rounded intimately over a relaxed shoulder. They twitched at the shock of my discovery, and I froze, not ready to learn more.

  The chest rising below me was bare too, and my lids morphed into crumpled lines of denial. Had I not completed my mission? Had I caved in to Cassiel and slept with him in a drunken stupor?

  I can’t remember!

  Maybe my sacrifice for Gabriel had been a dream.

  Afraid I’d wake my bedmate, I didn’t withdraw my arm. Slowly, I moved my other arm down my side, only to confirm my incomplete state of dress.

  Cassiel’s silk negligee still hung on my shoulders. It was untied and seemed to serve as a blanket. The scanty piece of clothing haphazardly draped me as well as my…guest. Besides it, all I wore was my bra and panties.

  Oh God, oh God, oh God. What does this mean?

  I should determine whose arm circled my waist. All I knew was that it looped around me and kept me nestled to him. I procrastinated, postponing the truth as long as possible.

  Skin, soft and warm, right under me. My hands couldn’t remain idle any longer, and before I was ready, they began to roam.

  My palm traced a cheekbone and the hollow beneath. It moved to the curved tip of a nose, then to lips that puckered in a quiet kiss at my touch.

  He’s awake! Please, don’t let it be…

  His breath drifted slow and even against my fingertips, and I couldn’t seem to remove them from his mouth. Turning a little, my other palm strayed too, feeling the ridge of a collarbone, tangling into hair.

  I gasped. This made no sense.

  For a second, I dove in deep and inhaled the scent at his neck. Hope unfolded anxious and fidgety at the edge of my heart. Then, for the first time in almost a year, my eyes shot open and stared straight into his.

  “Gabriel!”

  A soft laughter vibrated under my hands. “Good morning, sun.”

  “You’re with me? This can’t be Heaven—I don’t understand.”

  “Did you really think I could let you die?”

  I sat up, straddling him. I needed to cup his face on the pillow, drink him in, soak up every dear feature. His eyes were half shut, but aquamarine depths glimmered at me from underneath his lashes.

  I’ve missed you so much!

  “How did you figure out our plan?” I asked.

  Gabriel’s smile dissipated. His gaze iced
over as he pulled himself up by the abdominals. Out of nowhere his hands cuffed my wrists between our bodies, and I drew in a sharp breath.

  “My brother…what he did—” He shook his head, “Gaia—shit!”

  “You’re cursing. That’s not good, is it?”

  With a growl, he let go of me and spun. My body didn’t shift in the slightest, and yet I found myself seated on his butt, facing a golden back. His fists double-punched the mattress, causing the bed to shudder.

  “I know. It’s just—ah, the way he touched you!”

  Muffled roars suffocated into the pillow. Gingerly, I leaned down until I straightened out on top of him. The sound whipped through his back and into my chest.

  I slipped my arms under his body, pulling myself close. For a second, I reveled in the sensation of my skin against his. Then, I let my mouth trail up his neck. The friction from his throat faded as I kissed my way up to his ear.

  “Hush, you. Don’t think about that,” I murmured.

  “He had no right, and I was powerless!”

  A rush of uncertain delight spilled into my belly. “Do you know what’s happening, Gabriel? Do you have any idea?”

  Labored breathing was the only answer I got.

  “I’m not sure, but I think you’re jealous, baby.”

  “Baby?” I just called an angel “baby.”

  The breathing stopped altogether. His form tensed under me while the silence lasted longer than I liked.

  Gently this time, he rotated. He met my embrace and exhaled against my ear. Then, Gabriel’s arms tightened around me. They crossed over my back as if trying to protect every inch.

  “You’re here,” I mumbled unnecessarily and sensed his features pull into what could be a tentative smile.

  He let go and framed my face with his hands, moving me out to meet my lips. Between each kiss, his words tickled my skin.

  “I didn’t understand what was going on at Cassiel’s place at first. The pain hit me so hard it took a while.”

  “In the meantime, you threw a temper tantrum,” I giggled, but he didn’t see the humor.

  “Soon, I caught on to your reactions, how they lacked in sincerity, and the way you kept asking for more champagne. Then, before I knew it, you were really drunk.”

  Two fingers tucked a lock behind my ear before they caressed their way to my mouth.

  “Sunshine, once I noticed how frustrated you were, I began to concentrate on your signals instead of drowning. I saw every time you moved his hands away. I just couldn’t piece together why your responses were so subtle.”

  I kissed his fingertips, and he shut his eyes for a moment.

  “Then, when the alcohol erased your inhibitions, you let him hold you tighter. You didn’t see where his hands wandered…”

  Gabriel groaned again and pressed me into his shoulder, the length of my body crushed against his.

  My plea came out muffled. “Don’t tell me anymore—I don’t want to remember.”

  “I won’t, sunshine.”

  His mouth moved under my hair, a hot blast against my ear as he kissed my temple.

  “But in the end I understood that it was a hoax. Your goal wasn’t hard to grasp after that. To endure the simulation up until you jumped almost killed me, though. When you jumped off the roof, you were finally outside his goddamn shield and I could catch you. Shit!”

  “Gabriel, you’re swearing again…I didn’t even think you knew how to. Look at you!”

  “Dammit. Ah!”

  His sudden lack of control was achingly sweet. He made me laugh, and I freed my arms to tickle him into a lighter mood too. “My bodyguard is free falling from the skies. Now what?” I teased.

  “Quit it, sun.”

  “No way, angels are ticklish?”

  “Hey, don’t!”

  His chuckles sounded choked. He squirmed under me before strong arms suspended me in the air. Suddenly, I found myself in the middle of the room with a glorious, out-of-breath angel. With a delightful bedhead, he toted me around his waist in a death grip.

  “You’re so beautiful…” I mumbled.

  “Uh, right…?” He frowned as if trying to figure out a puzzle.

  “And that’s like saying you’re blond, isn’t it?”

  The door flew open and a double intake of breath from the doorway had us freezing in place.

  For a second, I met the stares of Lauren and Cindy before they zoomed in on Gabriel. I cringed, realizing how loud we must have been for them to violate our unspoken code of privacy.

  Their eyes widened, and I knew exactly what they saw. A divinity of a male whose only piece of clothing was washed-out 501s slung low on his hips; me, in underwear and a way too sexy negligee trailing open behind me, with arms and legs secured around him.

  “No knocking?” Gabriel’s voice sounded amused.

  On cue, they both started fiddling with the doorknob. The simple task of pulling a door closed seemed to be a bit much, but they finally managed. Their entire, longwinded exit occurred in absolute silence.

  “Geez, it’s weird how I’m almost happy you weren’t shimmering.”

  Gabriel nodded while tasting my mouth, and it made me smile. Without setting me down, he moved us over to the windowsill where he formed me to his lap.

  “You’ve ruined my grand plan, baby. Do you have a backup solution for this mess?” I was only partly joking.

  His lashes fluttered open, revealing a deeper Bahama shade at the core. Before I could react, his palm covered my left breast.

  I sucked in a lungful. “What are you doing?”

  Gabriel didn’t reply. A light shudder spread from the root of my heart. Growing and expanding, warmth whooshed through arteries, and weightlessness took over. I burst into a fit of laughter and hugged him, unable to suppress my squeals. True happiness like I hadn’t felt since before the accident flooded me.

  “What did you just do to me?”

  “I’m letting you feel whatever you want again.”

  When he met my gaze and smiled, every cell in my body sparkled with joy. My retort bubbled out in a half-snicker. “Whatever I want? Well, too bad for you, because now I feel like I want to be with you all the time!”

  “Sounds good.”

  “Oh, and I feel like I want you visible all the time.” I laughed giddily.

  “Okay.”

  I kissed his neck, his chin, relishing the lightness inside me. Then, his reply registered with my brain. I froze.

  “What? You…You’re not making promises here, are you?”

  “I might be.”

  “What? We’ll be together? You’ll be with me?” I was stammering.

  The soft laughter that always sparked my nerves trickled out of him. “Sunshine, I should never have let things get so out of hand. I crave being with you. I want to hold you. Touch you. Since it didn’t work to stay away...” He trailed off.

  More than just pumping blood, my heart pounded. Suddenly, it was vibrant and alive. The emptiness had disappeared, the leaden weight vanished. At his next words, I wished I could fly, because I was bursting with him, with everything.

  “Time to seize the day.”

  Once I had dressed, Gabriel and I snuck into the hallway. Even though he didn’t shimmer, his irises shone with quiet happiness.

  A new compulsiveness came over me as I checked and double-checked that he followed me. The third time I did, he stopped and pulled me in. Bending down, he forced my chin up with a gentle push of his knuckles and rested his forehead to mine.

  “Sun, I’m not going anywhere, I promise. Nothing else matters right now.”

  My happy sigh echoed with unnatural force through the corridor. When my gaze snapped up, more than half of the rooms were open. The girls stood with jaws slack and peepers popping in their doorways.

  Unnerved by the attention, I shot a pleading glance at Gabriel, who raised an eyebrow at me. I turned back to them, stuttering.

  “Err, good morning…”

  Gabriel
chuckled. No help from him—great.

  “Girls, this is Gabriel. My…my boyfriend.” I rushed, pointing in their general direction while he shifted behind me.

  “Gabriel, meet—” As I spoke, he drew me near, and my breath hitched. Hands slipped around my waist, his chin settling on my head. Why did he do this to me? Gabriel’s chest rose and fell contentedly at my back. The intimacy of our embrace left me pink with uncomfortable pleasure.

  “—Cynthia, Lauren, Christie, Amber, Emily, Nikki, and Jess.”

  Lauren nodded curtly at Gabriel before averting her stare in unconscious self-preservation. Always a stickler for rules, she began.

  “You’re aware, I think, of the house rules.” She squared her shoulders and glared at me.

  “Guests of the opposite sex cannot sleep over since the rules say they have to be out of the dorm by eleven p.m. the night before.”

  Oh, not the night after? Duh.

  “Sorry Lauren, you’re right—” The person berating me had just been in my room. I’d been clinging to Gabriel in a state too disheveled for words. Like a seven-year-old, I let out a girlish laugh, unable to keep going.

  Gabriel held me closer, and when he spoke, his voice was so sensual that my stomach clenched.

  “Lauren, I apologize. I shouldn’t have imposed myself on you girls. It won’t happen again.”

  Shy giggles and disappointed murmurs chimed around us. Cindy felt dizzy judging by the way she plopped down on the floor with a dreamy smile.

  Somebody whispered, “Oh, please, you can impose yourself on me any day,” only to snicker breathlessly. I grimaced.

  I didn’t think Gabriel had dazzled them, but the reactions he drew were too strong. Just as I wished he’d tone it down, his palm pressed reassuringly against my abdomen.

  “Don’t worry, Gaia. I’ll dim.”

  ****

  Happiness inundated and overflowed—I was invincible. The elevator didn’t fit my exuberance, so I attacked the four flights of stairs with giant strides. In a burst of energy, I decided to outrun Gabriel, who immediately caught on to the game.

  Each time I sent a giddy glance over my shoulder, he had closed the gap minutely. With a lopsided smirk, he followed my moves from his lounged pose on the banister while he slid after me.